Shattered
by eternalsunset7
Summary: New Moon rewritten, with a twist. When Edward leaves, and Alice follows, she turns into a rebel. the sly, but the impossibly sweet Colton enters the picture. What will become of her, and will she ever return to the innocent girl that Edward saw? BxE/BxOC
1. Chapter 1: Frozen

First Chapter! Sounds really similar to Stephenie Meyer, but I promise it'll get better!

Anything familiar isn't mine.

His ice cold fingers entwined with mine.

"Good morning." He whispered into my ear. I smiled, feeling the cool breeze of his breath and lovely scent washing over me.

"Good morning to yourself." I retorted and stretched up for a kiss. He awarded me with a small peck before drawing something out from behind his back.

"Your gift?" He smiled, waving a thin silver package in the air. I frowned – I didn't want any more reminders that I was finally older than him. Edward's face dropped, and then lit up again.

"Later, then." He grinned, teeth flashing in the dim light of cloudy Forks. Alice skipped up to me and dragged me by my hand across the parking lot.

"It's your birthdayyy." She sang. I half-heartedly shushed her.

"Still a secret then? Alright. Just be sure to come over tonight." She smiled angelically.

"But I still have to watch Romeo and Juliet!" I insisted. She pouted, and Edward came back and laced his fingers through mine once more. He pressed his lips to my cheek once.

"Don't worry, Alice. I'll bring her around… 7?" Alice's bell-like laugh tinkled through the air as she ran off, waving her fingers at me.

I pouted, and Edward looked at me, reprimanding, and pressed his lips to mine once more before heading to class. "I love you more than the world." He breathed, his golden eyes burning into mine. "I know." I replied and leaned my head against his arm.

-Time lapse: The day after the party-

I awoke with my arm pressed against the soothing cool of Edward's skin. He gazed down upon me, pondering something. Suddenly, he dragged me out of the bed and pulled me up to his lips desperately. Faintly, I was reminded of last year, when James threatened my life, as my lips moved against him. Soon, as always, he pulled his lips away from mine and glanced out the window.

"I have to go." He choked out, throwing open the window. I reached after him, heart breaking – was he leaving me?

"Edward! Wait!" I cried hopelessly. "Are you coming back?" I choked up, tears filling my eyes. At the look of despair on my face, his eyes betrayed some sadness.

"I don't know." He whispered, barely audible to my human ears.

"You can't be leaving me. You can't!" I cried, tears flowing fully.

"I have to, Isabella Swan. I want to be with you in my whole entity – no restrictions, no fear, no danger to your life. And I refuse to return without figuring out how to accomplish that – how to be human again."

"And if that's impossible? If that day never comes? If I'm old and wasted and GONE when you come back?" I choked out, my heart continuing to beat painfully, despite my wishes to never be without him. I reached desperately after him, clutching at his shirt.

"Please, Edward. Stay."

"I can't." He said, voice completely void of emotion, and turned away. Carefully, he pried my fingers away from his shirt, and leapt gracefully out the window.

"Don't go." I choked out into the night air. And I thought, just maybe, I heard three words.

"I love you." It seemed to carry on the wind, and seal up my heart completely. Forever frozen until he returned for me.


	2. Chapter 2: Pieces

**Second chapter in a day! anything familiar isn't mine**

I felt myself drop back onto the bed – I felt it, but it wasn't me. Present in body, but not soul. I was faintly aware of the painful beating of my heart, the knife driven like a stake through the center of my heart – half of my life was gone. And I knew that I wouldn't be able to go on for long without the other half.

I decided to skip school.

_Ditching is healthy._

Those words echoed in my mind, and I slowly, excruciatingly, recalled the time we first met.

_You should've just let the stupid van squish me._

Yes. Maybe that WOULD have been better – because then, I wouldn't be suffering now.

Rivulets of tears streaked down my face and my heart thumped painfully in my ears. _Edward, don't you love me? You said just yesterday… that you loved me more than the world. Isn't your humanity a part of the world? If you really truly loved me more than the world…you would've stayed here. With me. __**You lied.**_

At those thoughts, my heart split completely, and I wanted nothing more than to die. _Always leaving me behind…_

Phantom thoughts echoed in my mind, and I tried desperately to block them out. But my efforts were futile – it was like blackness, eating at my heart and trying to take over my mind.

Subconciously, I watched the sun rise and set, heard the cars driving by once in a while, the birds calling to each other, the leaves rustling quietly in the soft breeze. But above all, I recognized his absence. _Gone… gone…_

Alice POV

I blinked my eyes once as Jasper's face slowly swam into view. So Edward had left – I'd seen that months ago, just hoped it wouldn't happen. But now, I saw Bella, the pinkness in her cheeks faded, her eyes stony and lifeless, lying on her bed… and Edward still wasn't there.

My senses flared to life as I started running to the car – of course, Charlie would think it odd if I'd walked there. Jasper followed after me easily, blonde hair tousled by the breeze.

"Alice, where are you going?" He asked. As always, he sensed my determination to get somewhere – just not where.

"Bella." I breathed. We had to be there for Bella, or else she'd fall to pieces… which she was already well on the way to doing.

I jumped into my jet black Audi R8 with Jasper in the shotgun, and drove haphazardly to the quaint Swan residence.

As we approached the small house, Jasper winced.

"It feels like someone's _dying_ in there…" He choked out, overwhelmed by the emotions of despair.

I grimaced as I threw open the front door and sprinted upstairs to find a sobbing Bella sprawled on her bed helplessly.

Bella POV

A car pulled into the driveway, and someone threw open the front door of my house and sprinted up the stairs. Charlie? No… even through the muffled sounds of my pillow, I could hear the lighter steps…

A small hope still fluttered in my heart. Maybe, just maybe, Edward was back.

Cool hands brushed under my eyes, wiping the tears away. Yes, it was Edward, most definitely. "Edward?" I whispered as I turned my head towards the figure. But no… it wasn't. It was Alice, her thin figure outstretched towards me as I collapsed into tears again and buried my head in her shoulder.

And for a while, I just lay there in Alice's comforting embrace, crying into her shoulder. That is, until Charlie finally came home.

**:O what's going to happen when charlie sees her in this mess? Please review :(**


	3. Chapter 3: Bring Him Back

**Hey guys, I have writer's block so there's going to be really short chapters.**

**And the plot hasn't launched off yet – I'm so sorry ******

**I promise more though! Please, Read and Review! Only takes a few minutes :D**

"Bells?" Charlie called up the stairs. "Why's Jasper out in the driveway? Is Alice here?" He asked, his voice brightening at the aspect of seeing his little angel.

Alice stroked her cold hand through my hair one last time before running downstairs, some sort of reassurance to remain with me as she explained the gory details. She alighted from my bed and pranced down the stairs at a normal, human speed. How could she be so godforsaken HAPPY? I bit back tears again and listened to Alice quietly whispering the story to Charlie downstairs. I heard a few brief snippets of the conversation.

"…left her here…don't know when he's back…she's a mess…"  
At the last phrase, Charlie exploded.

"He's her first boyfriend! Doesn't he know what this is going to do to her? What's wrong with him?! WHERE IS HE."

Alice lay a soothing hand on his shoulder.

"Trust me Charlie. It's for her – he's not trying to hurt her."

At those words, I pressed a pillow to my mouth and screamed.

Lies – if he wasn't trying to hurt me, he'd be right here, by my side, and my eyes wouldn't be swollen from crying, and the throbbing in my arm would be soothed and I'd be HAPPY.

I heard light footsteps on the stairs as Alice revisited me – none of Charlie's heavy steps followed.

"Alice?" I whispered, peeping out of my pillow. "Make him come back." I begged hopelessly. "Tell him I don't care if he's human, I don't even care if we can never get married or … do anything."

Alice's face slowly became more and more morose.

"I can't, Bella, I don't even know where he went. And even if I did… it's about as easy as trying to convince him to make you a vampire."

By now, I was willing to grovel. So that's exactly what I did.

"Please…" I whispered, my voice hoarse from crying. I wrapped my warm, soft, human hands around her icy hard vampire ones. Tears stung my eyes again.

And then she crumpled.

"Fine. Fine. I'll leave. But you have to promise not to… find a cliff or a shotgun or something. And be nice to Charlie – he's worried." She sighed exasperatedly. "Nothing too drastic, okay? And if I don't find much, I'm coming back to be your backbone. Speaking of backbone…" She quickly dug through her purse, and whipped out a shiny black credit card. "I can at least leave you with something."

I stifled more tears and a laugh – same old Alice. I pulled her into a brief, hard, hug.

"Thank you so much." I murmured into her ear as she pecked my cheek quickly and pulled away. Alice ran down the stairs, an air of new duty in everything she did, and said goodbye to Charlie.

"Bye Charlie. Take good care of Bella!" She called.

"You won't be back?" He asked, a little sad.

"I will be back." She yelled, her legs already in the sleek car. "Just not for a while."

And with that promise and new hope in my mind, I fell asleep with one last thought:

_Alice was going to bring him back. _


	4. Chapter 4: Insanity

**Hi guys, kind of a late update. Sorry ******

**Disclaimer: Anything familiar isn't mine. **

The next morning dawned bright and sunny, taunting me. It seemed to mock me, _Haha, the Cullens are gone and have left you!_ I did my best to ignore it, but it seemed to lodge itself in a small crevice in my heart – the one that Edward and Alice had left open. Bright mood darkened, I went to my closet and picked out some random clothes, not even looking to see what I was picking. Alice would be outraged. Or would have been, if she were here.

I clumped down the stairs and plopped into a chair. Charlie raised his eyebrows at my new lazy resolve – I was surprised he wasn't at work yet. He opened his mouth to say something, and then shut it, deciding against whatever he was going to say. Then, something in my resolve led him to open it again, and close it. Soon, he looked like a gaping fish, and I was fully irritated.

"Dad, just spit it out?" I half ordered, half asked politely. I hoped he was sensible enough not to mention anything about… him.

He cleared his throat, attempting to compensate for time.

"Uhm… that's an interesting skirt you've got on…" He mumbled, hesitating to say what he did, seeing as though he knew little about women's fashion.

Quickly, I glanced down – I didn't own many skirts, and the only one I did own would've restricted me from clomping down the stairs. I groaned inwardly – in my thoughtlessness, I had donned an outrageous pink tube top my mom had bought me and yanked it up to fit snugly over my hips. I trudged upstairs to go change, and behind me, Charlie called after me, "And isn't that shirt suited more for Phoenix than for Forks?"

Sure enough, I was wearing a white spaghetti strap top as my shirt. Frustrated, I pulled off my ill suited "skirt" and shirt and threw them on the floor. Reminder to self – throw these out after school. Then, I carefully looked through the closet, and chose some random pair of black jeans that Renee thought were "fashionable" – hey, at least they reflected my mood. Then, I pulled a black tee over my head. Black and black, what was there to not match? Quickly running my fingers through my hair and pulling my backpack over my shoulders, I ran down the stairs and flew out the door – I was running late. Charlie appraised my outfit doubtfully, but shrugged it off.

The roar of my truck surprised me – it'd been so long since I'd used it to drive to school… Pushing that thought to the back of my mind, I made up a list of excuses for not doing my homework or make up work:

a) I got bitten by a vampire, and was screaming in pain for the past ehhh 48-60 hours?

b) My vampire boyfriend ditched me and ran off to who knows where while I lay in bed crying my eyes out

c) My dog ate it. All of it. You know, the imaginary one.

d) Alice dragged me out shopping for all day yesterday, and I had no choice.

e) I was lying in bed with a raging fever, immobile and able to do nothing.

I considered all of my option carefully… not. As I pulled into the school, I quickly made up my mind to forge a note from Charlie excusing me from my homework… because of my raging fever, of course. Climbing out of my old truck, I rushed to class, avoiding any obstacles that I might trip over.

"BELLA!" Someone screamed across the entire parking lot – gosh desperate much? I turned my head to look at them and smiled hesitantly at the tuft of blond hair bobbing up and down between the cars, waving it's, I mean his, hand up and down. He sprinted as quickly as he could across the lot – then again, after you've seen a vampire run, nothing's fast enough, and I waited impatiently at the foot of the stairs for him.

"Hi Mike." I said courteously, voice completely void of anything except the drive to show that my parents had raised me to NOT be an impolite dog.

He smiled widely at me – didn't he have a girlfriend?- and gestured to my truck.

"Where's Edward? Don't you usually get a ride with him? And where were you yesterday?"

Ignoring the first two questions, I gave him my petty excuse.

"I was sick. Didn't feel like coming to school." Okay, so the second part wasn't really an excuse.

Like the clueless lovesick git he was, he didn't notice my smooth [psh] avoidance of the first two questions.

"Oh, I hope you feel better!" He called as I nodded and escaped to my seat. I glanced at the empty seat next to me and my optimistic mood was darkened – would I go through the rest of the day with painful reminders like this?

And then Jacob Black walked into the classroom. He stooped to fit in the doorway, and I almost laughed. Almost. After a brief chat with the teacher, he was directed toward Edward's old seat and his face brightened at the aspect of sitting by me.

"Hey Bella!" He smiled, barely fitting in the tiny desk.

"Hi Jake… wait, aren't you a sophomore? HOW ARE YOU IN MY CLASS." I screamed, and then clamped my mouth shut when the entire class turned to stare at me. I wasn't THAT stupid… was I?

"Uhm… your class isn't the most prestigious for a senior…" He continued when I glared at him "And I got into an advanced program on the rez?"

If I would have been chewing something, I would have choked.

"You? Advanced? Your brain is probably the size of a pea." I scoffed and Jake reached over and nudged me easily. Unfortunately, the teacher saw it all.

"Mr. Black, please refrain from abusing the other students." Jake had the decency to blush, his russet skin turning a dark brown.

"Sorry." He mumbled quietly, irritated, as the bell rang and I began grueling through the beauty of Calculus. Fun.

Thankfully, the pain was soon over as the bell rang and I shoved my papers into my bag. Jake stood up and waited for me.

"Be nice and show me to my next class?" He asked hopefully. I remembered my crazy first day, and decided to take pity.

"So, why did you transfer?" I asked, walking with him toward his class, which was next door to mine.

"Uhm… Billy decided to move, better for my education." He mumbled. I doubted it, but I let it slip by. I could always interrogate him some other time, when Charlie invited them over – I was sure that I wouldn't have to wait long.

As we walked by, I saw a little clique of people. Today, I looked just like them, decked in all black with bags under my eyes. It was the rejects, and slowly, I began to wonder what it was like to be like them – depressed, emo, and gothic. I was over halfway there already.

So that day, two days after my eighteenth birthday, walking with my family friend Jacob Black, I made up my mind to stop by their infamous hide out after school. Along with the rebels, the druggies and the nerds. I wonder how it'd feel to be a rebel…

**Hum de dum, and thus we launch into the plot! Sorry, I let my sarcasm drip into the story – Bella just decides to be super optimistic. Don't worry, it wears off in the next chapter. Unless, of course, my lovely readers want more ******

**So it's your call – do you want Bella to be all triple x, hardcore rebel. Or just rebel-in-Bella's-definition type rebel, aka making Charlie mad?**

**If I get no reviews, then I'll do whatever I want.**

**P.S: READ AND REVIEW SILENT FOREVER by TWILIGHTERSUNITE**


	5. Chapter 5: So This Is What It's Like

**Anything familiar is Stephenie Meyer's.**

**Guys I'm so sorry about the late update. School has been horrible, even with summer approaching **** anyways, enjoy the chapter! I've never smoked or anything myself, so sorry if it's inaccurate. Feel free to correct me!**

I flashed a quick smile at Jake and made my way to my truck. He climbed into his Rabbit and drove off as I bided my time in the truck, making it seem as though I was looking through my bag. Slowly, I heard the roar of his Rabbit fading, and I peeped up over my dashboard to make sure the lot was clear.

Honestly, I shouldn't be ashamed of doing this. But I was. Quickly, I darted out of my truck, shut the door of my truck as quietly as possible, and snuck quietly across the parking lot. My glance flitted nervously around the school as I made my way toward the back alley, where the garbage cans and stuff were located.

It felt like a James Bond movie. The clumsy version. In the back of my mind, I thought _Alice will see this. She'll put a stop to it._ And then I remembered – the Cullens are gone. Well, at least the ones I liked. I mean, Emmett was here, but he wasn't allowed to talk to me, and Rosalie didn't exactly like me…

I shrugged it off and ducked my head away from the thin mist that had begun a few minutes ago. I crept my way into the back alley hesitantly, receiving several wary, but not unkind glares. I offered a shy smile, but when it wasn't returned, I quickly wiped it off my face.

After facing no aversion, I crept into a more central part of the alley and leaned nonchalantly against the brick wall. I choked back a cough – the sweet smoke was burning my throat and eyes. The guy, I think his name was Colton, looked up at me and offered me a… what was it called? A joint. Right. I hesitantly accepted it – after all, Charlie was a cop… I couldn't get caught with this junk. I pressed it to my lips and inhaled deeply, and then was assaulted by a coughing fit. Several of the black-clad members of this group snickered, but Colton smiled up at me.

"Try to breathe out your nose." He advised kindly. To my surprise, he had a nice voice. Not like _him_, but a voice that every girl's dream guy had. I swallowed to clear my throat, and then inhaled once more. After a few more puffs, it became more natural. And then, I felt the affects of the marijuana. I felt a little disoriented – where was I again? I think it'd been about 30 minutes… I think?

The world was kind of fuzzy, my eyes felt strained, and my heart was pounding in my chest. Was I high? Is that what it was called?

The wall I was leaning against was nice and smooth – interesting texture for brick. I pressed my palm against the wall and dragged it down angrily, desperate to feel something other than the pure smoothness. I gasped slightly as I finally felt it – the rough texture against my blood stained palm. I glanced at it and tried to recall something familiar – someone who wouldn't have been able to do this… but all my problems were slipping away into nothingness…

"Hey uhm, Bella, is it?" Dark haired guy in the corner, kind of hot, too, asked.

"I'm Bella, am I? You know, that means pretty in Italian." I giggled and smiled goofily. He glanced at me, something like worry and concern in his gaze.

"It's getting kind of late… I don't think you should go drive… or anything… for that matter right now? You wanna crash at my place? Call your dad, if you want." He suggested earnestly. I nodded mindlessly, not sure what I was doing. He pressed something cold into my hand – was it a rock? I glanced at it, and then back up at him, unsure of what he wanted me to do. He sighed and took the… thing back. Impatiently, he flipped it open and moved his fingers rapidly, and then pressed the rock to his ear. I shrugged and leaned back against the glass smooth wall.

"Chief Swan? Yea, this is Colton Evans, one of Bella's classmates. She's not feeling too well, uhm, and I think I'm just going to let her crash at my place for a bit until she perks up. Is it fine with you?" He explained fluidly. Some strange and disoriented speech crackled from the phone, and Colton, I think, nodded briefly and said goodbye before flipping the device shut.

He then glanced up at me, took the joint out from between my fingers and crushed it against the ground.

"No more for you." Colton took my warm, no, hot, hand into his cool one and led me off somewhere. I trusted him – he hadn't tried to kill me yet, had he? Somehow, I couldn't place my feet one in front of the other. I crashed into the walls, and the grassy ground was suddenly approaching my face quickly. He caught me right before I collided with the ground and swept me up into his arms.

"Ditz." He sighed as I giggled again. He was lean, and muscled – I could tell that much in my disoriented state.

Colton let me down gently into his relatively nice car, and then climbed into the other side.

"Don't touch anything. I don't want you to kill us." He warned as he started the car and drove toward his house, I supposed. I giggled again – how girly of me.

The trees flashed by ever so slowly – were we really driving so slow? I couldn't make out too many details. The ground was orange-ish. Interesting.

I contently contemplated the dashboard for the rest of the ride. It seemed to be hours long. Colton took one look at me, and then dragged me out of the car and into his house. I smiled sheepishly at him as he let me down onto the sofa.

"Sleep. I don't want to return you to Charlie like this." He said. He unwound his arms from around my body and was straightening out as my arms flashed up and pulled his face down to mine.

And then his cool lips were against my hot ones, moving in perfect synchronization. I pulled myself up to sitting position, and he leaned over me, his arms on either side of my face. My fingers raked through his thick, dark hair as the kiss grew deeper. His hands wrapped around my waist and pulled me closer to him as my lips moved recklessly against his. I opened my mouth slightly and let my tongue run over his bottom lip before he tore away.

"I… can't do this. Not while you're in this state. If you ever want to, when you're in the right state of mind, I'll be here. But I won't do this to someone who's in the same state as you are." He panted breathlessly. Something ached dully, sort of like a half healed wound being torn open again. But the pain wasn't acute – the joint had been pretty useful. I shrugged my shoulders, shaking it off, and then lay back down on the couch.

"Just… sleep off the effects." Colton advised before wandering into the next room.

And I quickly and willingly let the darkness overtake my disoriented, confused state.

**Okay sooo I know Bella is like REALLY disoriented for a joint of weed, but for first timers, it can be pretty strong. It's like alcohol – impairs decisions, memory, motor skills, and senses. **

**And guys – if you review, it's your call. What do you want to happen? **

**P.S. I don't know if I should continue… no one really reads or reviews or anything… so should I just cut it off?**


	6. Chapter 6: Author's Note Sorry!

Guys I'm so sorry I haven't updated, I'm in Korea right now without internet access. I'll update ASAP im sorry

Right now im mooching off of SK telecom :D

Again, I'm really sorry :[


	7. Chapter 7: Good Guys Exist

I awoke, completely disoriented, and glanced around at my surroundings. And then I saw a dark haired… well, hottie, approaching me across the room, which was sideways… and it all came rushing back. MY advances on HIM, MY desperation…

"Oh god." I whispered, curling up and ducking my head into my knees.

Colton smiled patronizingly. "I'll forget everything that happened." He said, but I saw the pull of something else behind his eyes.

"Thank you," was my sole, whispered reply, dripping with gratitude for more than just his forgetting. He gave a weak smile.

"It's only 9 o'clock, you can still get home and finish your homework. Are you hungry?" He asked, evading the topic.

"It's fine – I don't want to invade on you much more. I think I'll head home right now…" I replied carefully, before realizing I had no idea where I was.

"I'll drop you off," Colton responded, ever thoughtful.

COLTON POV

Isabella Swan was beautiful, even when she was a mess like this. Of course, every guy in the school thought the same thing, and was bitter when she fell in with the Cullens. But I didn't like her when I first saw her – pretty girls had ruined me, and I tended to avoid them. But then I saw her for who she really was – smart, sensible but dizzily in love, and happy – and I knew that I wanted her for my own.

And she was the one kissing me passionately, and I wanted to give in so bad, and let her have what she wanted… but it wasn't her. It was the drugs.

So I'd reluctantly pulled away and let her drift to sleep, watching her like a mother hen. As always, my parents weren't home, so that served no cause to be scared.

And then she awoke, and I forced myself to tell her I'd forget about it, because it'd make her happy. She was still in love with Edward. She just couldn't get over it.

And so Isabella Swan spent all of 6 hours in my private presence, and I still couldn't make a move on her.

Life sucks. And then you die.

BELLA POV

I watched the road carefully as he drove me home, not questioning any of the million questions sprinting through my head.

Charlie ambushed me the minute I drove in, asking if I was alright and if I was hungry blah blah blah, all of which I weren't really in the mood to answer.

"I'm fine Ch-Dad. Just a bit of a headache, I'll go up to my room."

That was when he finally took notice of Colton in the other half of the car, his eyes darting between the two.

"You look rather sketchy to me. What did you do with my daughter?" He asked, basically interrogating the poor guy.

"I let her sleep on my couch while I did some work." He replied smoothly, catching Charlie off guard.

"Oh. Thanks." Charlie said, properly chastised.

Colton gave a small smile and then waved goodbye to me.

"Feel better." He said, and I knew he meant for more than my "headache".

**Hi guys, really short update after a really long time – I'm sooo sorry :[ I'll try to update more often from now on, especially since it's summer. **

**Note: The "life sucks and then you die" isn't taken from Jacob – it's more from my Russian friend **


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